Being a woman is hard. Being a woman who is trying to fit into the norms of society is impossible.
It’s no wonder that so many women today are utterly exhausted, discouraged, depressed, and hopeless. The world screams at us, all that we should be, should do, should look like. Painting the picture of a perfect mom, wife, woman, all the while giving us conflicting messages as to what exactly that entails. We often see contradicting views, confusing right? Which one is right? Which one is best? We all want to be the best us, the best wife, the best mom but what does that look like? How do we get there?
Maybe you are like me, at times insecure in my own ability to be a good wife, a good mom, a good friend. I mean none of these things come with a step by step instruction guide. Maybe there are times where the tears flow more than the joy, where situations arise with a child that you have no idea how to parent through and inadequacy tries to creep in. Maybe there have been times when you have allowed someone’s negative perception of you to make you feel not enough, ugly, less than. Maybe you have been rejected, abandon, left behind and you believe that it has a direct connotation to your true worth.
It could have been as simple as a disapproving look in the grocery store as your child is having a code red meltdown and you football carry him out the front door leaving the groceries behind amidst the judging glares. Maybe it was a phone call from your husband telling you that once again he needs to go on a business trip and you feel the panic of having to single parent for a week rise up. (All you single parents out there I give you much respect and honor, you are amazing.) How about going out in public with all of your kids in the middle of the day because you homeschool? Ever got the questions with that one? “Why aren’t you in school?” “Vacation already?” “You are what, can you do that?” Maybe it was just a disapproving glance in the mirror when looking for a new swim suite to accommodate your changing body that you no longer recognize. Maybe it was having to put n/a on an application under job.
This world is great at judging you on with their ever-changing unrealistic expectations. Pinterest, Facebook, and most of the TV Shows and Magazines fully reinforce those very things. We are bombarded daily with all that we should be and many of us unwillingly take it on as to what should be our norm, believing the lies spewed forth. We ourselves are pretty great at judging ourselves too, and we are usually way harsher than anyone else. We judge our appearance, our job performance, our family, our friendships, our homes, and our bank accounts, the list goes on and on.
However, this is not how it was ever meant to be. This is not the life that our Father, God, ever intended for us. This is not the easy yoke he speaks of, or the rest that we are called to enjoy. Through His only son Jesus, he came to show us the very truth about who we are. To speak light into the darkness of our understanding of how amazing we are. He came to redeem our true identities and to show us our mirror image, Him. He came to give us the eyes to see and to tear the veil on the very distortion this world tried to put on our shoulders. He came to destroy our false idols of our mistaken identities.
Beautiful daughter, you are more than enough. The only truth of who you are is not found in the worlds perception but in Christ alone. We do not have to fit into the mold, in fact you were created not to. You are unique, his masterpiece, one of a kind, and totally glorious. You do not need to be anything, because you already are all that you ever need to be. You do not need to be a certain size, a certain color, a certain occupation, a certain station, you are more than enough, worthy of love, affection and intimacy.
Letting go of believing the lies of the world as your truth can be hard, as they are everywhere, every day, screaming at us. But there is one who is constantly pursuing you, tenderly, lovingly, reminding you that those things are not who you are. That only He, the creator of your being knows you, the real you.
He knows that your sensory seeking kiddo got overwhelmed by all the stimulation at the grocery store and lost it. He knows that the countless hours you have spent researching his disorder, loving, encouraging and driving that kiddo to appointment after appointment. He sees you advocate for your children and sees your heart of love for them, his heart in you for them. He knows you, the world does not.
He knows how difficult it is for you to get your four children where they need to be by yourself, he knows the anxiety you feel when you know there will be no relief coming and you have to do it alone. He understands the fear that tries to overcome you, because he sees your past and knows the root. He knows you, the world does not.
He knows the reason you had to homeschool was because your children were so relentlessly bullied that it was becoming unsafe for them. He sees that you had to get out of the house just to be around other people or you were going to go crazy. He also knows that your children are fully educated and above in many areas. He knows you, the world does not.
He sees that beautiful body of yours, all Size 14 of it, that lovingly carried 6 children but birthed 4. He sees those stretch marks of battle, the extra weight, the sagging breasts of this amazing body he created. He sees you, the real you and the fullness of your beauty. He knows you, the world does not.
He sees the enormity of your job as a stay at home mom. He sees the sacrifices you made letting go of your own career goals to raise these little gifts. He sees you ease the burden on your husband by just being at home. He sees this smart, intelligent woman, holding the college degree changing yet another diaper. He sees the countless loads of laundry, the boo boo’s you kiss, the love you give. He knows you, the world does not.
Oh, that we would allow the one who knows us best to be the only defining voice in our lives. Not the world, not our spouse, not even ourselves but Him and Him alone.
Daddy I pray for each woman today that reads this post I pray for women everywhere that struggle and strive to see themselves as beautiful, worthy, enough. I pray that you would continue to show each of us the truth of who you created us to be. I pray that not only would you reveal that to us but that you would help us to believe it. I pray that we would be able to let go of the lies that we tell ourselves and the lies of the world, let go of the judgement and condemnation and simply rest in who you say we are. I pray that when we look in the mirror we see the glory of who we are and nothing else, that we see nothing but our true selves as you have always intended. In Jesus name. Amen.